Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Egypt = Danger

Wow, I just got an e-mail from my friend Sarah, who lives in Egypt. And the basic gist of it was: As they came out of a McDonalds a four year old mugged them.

A FOUR YEAR OLD!

Pretty great.

Saturday, March 26, 2005

20 reasons to spend an evening with Garth

1. Dinner at Asian Bistro
2. The worst below-ground art exhibit ever created (I hope they had to pay the city to put those up)
3. A relaxing, long drive to and from common grounds, complete with extremely illegal U-turns
4. Mark Rothko
5. Breaking and entering into Luke's apt (sorry Timoni!)
6. Sims 2 (I KILLED JAQUELINE!!!!)
7. A screwdriver, a lesson learned in how Kaluha and Bailey's should NOT be mixed (ew, gross), and sour milk (but great OJ)
8. Milk-chan
9. Full-Metal Alchemist
10. A dead dog and fruit
11. Pie
12. Mirror-filled elevators
13. 20,000 pennies in a burlap sack
14. What guns Garth wants to use if he ever joins the FBI
15. Land mines and police chases on the beach
16. Artistically rendered bird collages made out of "fabrik"
17. "Today my cat drank toilet water. From the TOILET!"
18. Bargain books from Borders
19. Phrases such as "by the by..."
20. Monkeys dressed as clowns

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Lost luggage of the world, unite!

And what do you know... it DOES! At "The Unclaimed Baggage Center", in Scottsboro, AL. This warehouse has bought the rights to all unreturnable luggage in the U.S., and they get to sell it back to other people! It's remarkable... from the regular skirts and socks to full suits of armor, this store has it!

www.unclaimedbaggage.com

Check it out. Buy some Armor.

Saturday, March 19, 2005

Girlscouts KILL!!!!

I'm watching an ABC news report on Girlscout cookies right now. There are all of these people who are like "Girlscouts cookies are the devil! They should sell Boondoggle Keychains instead of those diabetes-causing horrors!" ... Ok, so I added the boondoggle part, but that's the basic idea. Susan Cooper, an unattractive, anorexic woman comes onto the camera and talks about how we're in the midst of an "obesity pandemic" (did she miss the memo? Why is she so thin in the midst of this PANDEMIC? She probably has friends in the goverment who supply her with special serum that causes her cheeks to cave inward), and that the girlscouts shouldn't be attacking the health of our helpless children.

Next, Michael Jacobson tells us that "girlscouts should be selling products that don't undermine our health... whether that's keychains... or... whatever!" Very intelligently put, Michael. Well done, well done.

As for me, I just don't know what I'll do if I can't buy my samoas next year! Oh, Lord, I feel sick with anguish at the thought of my children growing up in a world without Thin Mints! Someone must stop these paranoid cookie-nazis!

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

Dominatrix Poindexter

Timoni, I saw it! I saw a news report on CNN about "Matrix Dominatrix Condie Rice"! Haha. Wow... That just cracks me up.

Geoff, wanna go see Enon with me and Timoni on March 25? I think we're going to go, so if you wanna come along...

Ok, enough with the personal notes.

This weekend, as I read the Washington Post Magazine, a certain page caught my eye. Just like looking at the deep red of a setting sun, I found that I couldn't look away... from the full-page image of a flabby, cellulite-covered stomach hanging out over faded, too-tight, spandex undies. Apparently it was an ad for some plastic surgery place in Maryland. And down in the bottom corners were the nice little "Before" and "After" pictures. I was kinda grossed out but also a little intrigued. I found out (through my sleuthlike skills o' deduction... ie-reading the top of the page) that the head doctor's name was Byron Poindexter. I felt as though someone needs to inform him that he's missed his calling. It is highly probable that a man with the name "Poindexter" is not going to be good looking, and why would you get pastic surgery from a non-good-looking person? You wouldn't. No, a man with the name "Poindexter" is supposed to be in a basement lab, wearing pocket protectors and tapping the tips of his fingers together as he squints beady little eyes to the ceiling and cackles ruthlessly about his plan to conquer the world through computer programming.

(Many apologies if you're an ultra hip computer programmer. You're allowed to be. Unless your last name is Poindexter.)

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

Back by popular demand!

Ginny the Mac demands I update, so here I am, merely minutes after receiving her request! My apologies for being so lax, but busyness has called recently.

Current music: Le Tigre, Broken Social Scene and Ambulance mix
Current clothes: Sweatpants, duh, it's midnight. Like I'd be in stillettos... well... I might if I was at a club...
Current nail color: None. Can you believe it? Nope, no blues or blacks at the moment.
Current Activity: IMing with Gabe, listening to my music, and playing alchemy/canasta/bejewled online (not all at once. I keep switching between the three games). Aren't I a grand multi-tasker?

Let's see, what have I done this week... I've been so busy that I'll just keep it short and talk about my incredible weekend.

On Friday Timoni, Luke, and I grabbed some quasi-asian food at a little place near courthouse before driving downtown to the sweet melodies of 'Daft Punk' and 'VHS or Beta' so we could check out the newest in Korean Anime, "Sky Blue". We were pretty stoked because it was supposed to have been 3 years in the making or something, and have incredible artwork. But the experience basically turned into the following dialogue:

Luke: This is the worst dubbing I've ever seen.
Timoni: It's so bad we can't even make fun of it.
Marianne: That raccoon-rodent thing is my favorite character... Because it doesn't try to speak ENGLISH.

**main character gets shot in extremely cheesy manner**

All of us: BRAHA- oops. Everyone else looks sad...
::cover our mouths with hands and snicker through our fingers::

Needless to say, it was a bit of a disappointment, But we had fun anyways, as we always manage to do.

On Saturday, Timoni, Geoff, Garth and I went downtown to catch the Ambulance/VHS or Beta show, but it turned out to be sold out. Undaunted by our bad luck we turned our cold, shivering bodies to the wind and headed over to DC9. On the way we stopped at the Velvet Lounge, because none of us had ever been there and thought it'd be fun to see what it was like. Well let me tell you - it's about 10 feet x 10 feet, smokey and noisy. So we left. There's only so much to see in a tiny little room like that. But hey! It was a new experience, and there ain't nothing wrong with that!

We finally made it over to DC9, grabbed a spot on the couches in the back room for a few hours, and just hung out. Timoni and Geoff got wrapped up in an intellectually stimulating discussion about Dostoevsky while Garth and I got wrapped up in an intellectually stimulating game of drawing cartoons and playing hangman... Sometimes I like to imagine that I'm a brilliant scholar...

And Sunday was church. Then Chris and I hung out for a few hours. Well, actually we studied for a few hours and hung out for about 20 minutes. But it was still fun. Hanging out with Chris always is!

Have a great evening everyone!